Today is one of those days that I find myself in a very rainy mood. Though the sun shines outside my window, I’m a little rain cloud inside. As most of you know, my life is at a stand still right now. I’m waiting on either an acceptance or rejection from several companies I applied to work for and frankly, the wait is emotional agony. Half of me would like to believe that I’ll get the position I want and the other half snickers at the thought.
I’ll try my hardest not to dump my emotions into this post.We all have our own battles that we face. Mine just so happen to be what every college graduate is facing- the fear of unemployment. I try to think about the best possible outcome for myself but the uncertainty of it all just clouds the positivity with anxiety about what’s coming next.
People bombard me with messages to stay positive and expect the best possible outcome. I understand their sentiments and appreciate their wisdom. However, I think everyone deserves a “rainy day” sometimes. It’s awfully hard work trying to stay positive when all you want to do is lay in bed all day.
It’s kind of a lonely feeling. Unless someone else is going through the exact same thing they’ll never understand your outlook. We tend to live lifestyles that only have regard towards happy times and can’t understand seasons in life that are demoralizing.
Personally, I’m embracing these feelings and thoughts I have. Chasing them away consumes more energy than I have.